It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
