how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
