found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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