Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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