How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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