Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
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I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE