Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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