are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
It's blow job season.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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