Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Pants are for mortals
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
