Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
