Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
