i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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