Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
