bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
