Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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