If i come over, it means nothing
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize