that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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