Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
