I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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