please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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