Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
