yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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