You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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