my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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