McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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