yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize