im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
