Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
