she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
