So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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