Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
