I'd wear matching sweaters with you
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
