just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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