If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize