He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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