Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize