chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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