Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize