You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
