Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
