this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
