Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
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Hippo gnu deer
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
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I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato