Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
