drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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