You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
