I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
