You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
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How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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