I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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