Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
