why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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