guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
